Saturday, February 27, 2010

head down

During my last doctor's appointment I learned that our little one is head down. It's exciting news, as some women approach labor with the baby still failing to turn. I look at it as one step closer to a more natural birth.

There is of course always a chance he could turn again, but the doctor says it's unlikely. Nonetheless I'm doing all I can to keep him where he is; staying on my feet or sitting upright when possible, sleeping on my side, attaching the headphones and BabyPlus well below my navel.

I feel like he's really been engaging with the outside world. Chris and he play a little bit of push and push back; it's amazing the way that my whole stomach shifts as he moves toward his daddy's hand. He also really comes alive when I spend time on the pilates ball. Sometimes the kicks are painful, especially now that his feet are right up against my rib cage, but under most circumstances, it's just an odd sensation - one I could never truly describe.

I'm anxious for him to come. I recognize he needs these last 4 to 6 weeks to put on a little extra weight. It's also important that his lungs fully mature, but I'm ready when he is. There was a moment of panic a couple of weeks ago - a fear that our connection would be broken as soon as he made his way into the world. But that fear is gone, at least for now. And in this moment, I just want to hold him, feel him against my chest, and see him in his daddy's arms.

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