Friday, November 5, 2010

if my son is gay

You may have recently read the Nerdy Apple Bottom post. It seems to have gone viral, tweeted and re-posted by, what I think is everyone I know. And it made me start to wonder...what it my son were gay?

So here's what I think...

If my son is gay, I hope that in the next few months he will first crawl and then learn to walk. I hope that eventually that "mama mama mama" sound he makes when he's tired and sad, is associated with one of the two people who will always rush by his side to comfort him, hold and rock him to sleep.

If my son is gay, at three, I hope he knows his colors and his numbers. I hope he shares his toys and is gentle with the cat.

If my son is gay, at five I hope he'll be excited about the first day of school. I hope he'll learn to read and love to color. I hope his bumps are minor and his bruises small. I hope he plays soccer and tee-ball. I hope he knows what it means to be part of a team.

If my son is gay, at ten I hope he'll have slumber parties where he'll eat too much pizza and watch scary movies. I hope he still believes in Santa Clause and sees the world through the eyes of a child. I hope he'll want to cuddle up next to me during a thunderstorm.

If my son is gay, at thirteen, I hope he'll stand up straight even if he's the tallest boy in class. I hope he plays the piano or the violin or the guitar. I hope he starts to shine at something: math, music, basketball, writing. I hope he starts to dream big - seeing the world as full of possibility.

If my son is gay, at sixteen I hope he learns to drive and goes to the junior prom. I hope he studies hard and wants to go to college. I hope he is honest and compassionate. I hope he strives to do great things.

If my son is gay, at twenty-one I hope he travels to interesting places. I hope he's willing to take risks and reach high. I hope he knows it's okay to fail, as long as failure is a lesson. I hope he knows his mom is always just a phone call away.

If my son is gay, at thirty I hope he's found someone with whom to spend his life. I hope they come home often. I hope we celebrate Thanksgiving and Christmas and birthdays together when we can. I hope he's found purpose and sees a bright future ahead.

If my son is gay, at forty I hope he has children of his own. I hope he coaches little league and builds doll houses and model airplanes. I hope he lives nearby, but if not that we manage to find a way to be very much part of each others' lives.

If my son is gay, I hope he has a good soul and a great sense of humor. I hope his heart and his spirit are rarely broken. If my son is gay. I hope the world treats him with respect. I hope his sexuality does not keep him from accomplishing any goal. I hope he can play football, join the army, conduct an orchestra, design cars, mend broken bones, teach children, climb Everest, go to space, break the sound barrier...whatever he wants to do. I hope he can marry and have children without a fight. And, I hope no one will ever tell him he is less than, smaller than, weaker than, uglier than, stranger than anyone else because he is gay.

13 comments:

  1. Angie, I was one of the many that reposted the post about the boy who wanted to be Daphne and the mother that learned to rise by watching and loving her son. I was quite touched by what she wrote but not so touched as I was by your sharing your hopes for YOUR son. Thank you for posting and for dreaming and for, well, being a good mom and friend. Michael Westley.

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  2. I also posted the link on facebook. The story really hit home for me, and so does your blog post. Having 2 little boys, I hope in my heart of hearts that they are happy and the world treats them with respect regardless of their sexual preference.

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  3. Awesome. What a lucky son you have.

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  4. Thanks to Libby for sharing this. It brought me to tears. Very nicely done. You are a great mom, and he is a lucky boy.

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  5. I don't know you at all, a friend shared this link on FB and I am so glad I read it. It brought me to tears - and it's 100% true. Thank you.

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  6. Ok. Crying now. That was awesome. I just saw Ricky Martin on Oprah, and he spoke about some of the experiences you mentioned. He was very inspirational - as was your blog!

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  7. Stellar post! I'm glad I found your blog. I'll be following.

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  8. May I please read this aloud to my 8th grade class? They are full of "gay-this, or that's so gay" I have begun a campaign to wipe out the word used in a derogatory fashion. Your sentiments are wonderful, touching, and invigorating--and you have a picture of New York. Thanks for your thoughtful, well written letter...

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  9. Dear "anonymous" absolutely. I am honored that you would want to share it with your class and I would love to know how they respond.

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  10. A true unveiling of your pure heart. My grandson is so blessed to have such a mother in you.

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  11. I did share your blog with 120 students. Each class period began by my reading aloud and then, allowing for discussion. My students were deeply moved. When I read the title there was giggling and tittering, however by the closing line the room was silent. Thank you so much for your eloquent writing style and your touching story line. My students compared your writing to Martin Luther King's I have a Dream Speech because each line began the same...though I teach reading, it gave me the chance to talk about parallelism...Your blog was exactly what I needed to get a strong message across. Thanks I am only anonymous because I don't do internet very well--my daughter writes Libby Logic...go take a look at my granddaughter--she is fabulous. Thanks again.

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  12. That was a great post. I hope I can also share that. I wish more people would think this way.

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